When Your Boss Changes the Rules Halfway Through

How to stay grounded when the goalposts keep moving

It usually happens in a normal conversation, which is why it messes with you.

You walk into a one-on-one thinking you’re going to give a straightforward update. You did what you were asked to do. You hit the deadline, cleaned up the work, handled the stakeholders, kept things moving. You might even feel a small, quiet satisfaction, the kind you don’t talk about because it’s just your job.

Then your boss says something like, “This needs to feel more strategic,” or “I need you to show more ownership,” or “Leadership wants a different approach.” They don’t say it like it’s new. They say it like it was always the point.

And you sit there, nodding, trying to keep your face neutral, while a part of you is scrambling. Because last time, the instruction was the opposite. Last time, it was “just get it done.” Last time, speed mattered more than polish. Last time, you were told not to overcomplicate it.

You leave the meeting and the worst part isn’t even the new expectation. The worst part is the doubt. You start replaying the past few weeks trying to figure out if you misunderstood, if you missed something obvious, if you somehow did the wrong thing while doing exactly what you were told.

This is what moving goalposts does. It doesn’t just make work harder. It makes you question your own memory.

If this happens to you repeatedly,